


Satanic Setter Squad

by KaizoKorous



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: 1st year bb’s must be protected, 2nd years bullying the 3rd years, 2nd years teaming up, Atsumu being a crackhead, Dense ass Kageyama, Hes a bb, I had to retype that 5 times, I’ll add tags later am lazy, Kita scary Oop-, M/M, Mom Squad, Oikawa being bullied, Osamu wanting to Ctrl alt delete his brother, Osamu wishing his parents didn’t copy and paste, Poor Osamu, Pretty Setter Squad, Semi done with life, Shirabu and Yahaba being best friends, Shirabu being a little shit, Shitposts, Shut yer mouth, Stop bullying Kageyama Oikawa smh rude, bb Kogame, captain chat, dense stupid Kageyama, dont ask, duh - Freeform, haha - Freeform, haha Im gonna use that probably, i love him so much, im so boring lmao, lol, oh right tagging time, oh yeah tagging sorry-, poor Akaashi please save him from depression, shirabu being a bitch, swears, this time I want them to talk smack about him, welcome to Kenma’s tedtalk, yahaba being a little shit, yes I did change it, ”Give me back my damn switch Kuroo”, ”NO SWEARS”
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-28
Updated: 2020-11-19
Packaged: 2021-03-08 04:14:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 1,418
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26689492
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KaizoKorous/pseuds/KaizoKorous
Summary: Sugawara: Wait we can add anyone we want??Oikawa: YesOikawa: Wait no--Sugawara adds Kageyama to the chat-Oikawa: JEJEIENDHIEODKEKDJEIE I MADE A MISTAKE.A group chat Oikawa makes but regrets instantly
Relationships: Akaashi Keiji & Sugawara Koushi, Akaashi Keiji/Bokuto Koutarou, Goshiki Tsutomu/Koganegawa Kanji, Hinata Shouyou/Kageyama Tobio, Iwaizumi Hajime/Oikawa Tooru, Kageyama Tobio & Oikawa Tooru, Kita Shinsuke/Miya Atsumu, Koganegawa Kanji & Moniwa Kaname, Kozume Kenma/Kuroo Tetsurou, Miya Osamu/Suna Rintarou, Sawamura Daichi/Sugawara Koushi, Semi Eita/Shirabu Kenjirou
Comments: 2
Kudos: 165





	1. Where it all begins.

**Author's Note:**

> Let me just say that I have no idea what I’m doing

~ _3:42Pm Friday_ ~

- _ **Oikawa** adds **Sugawara** , **Yahaba** , **Kenma** , **Koganegawa** , and **Moniwa**_ -

**Oikawa** : Hello everyone! 

**Sugawara** : What is it now Oikawa

**Oikawa** : It’s a setters chat, add anybody you want that’s a setter of course

**Kenma** : How tf did you get my number

**Oikawa** : Chibi-Chan gave it to me!

**Kenma** : Dang it Shoyo

**Sugawara** : NO SWEARS

**Sugawara** : Wait we can add anyone we want??

**Oikawa** : Yes

**Oikawa** : Wait no-

- **Sugawara** adds **Kageyama** to the chat-

**Oikawa** : JEJEIENDHIEODKEKDJEIE I MADE A MISTAKE.

**Kageyama** : Hello Oikawa-San.

**Sugawara** : Can you explain why you made this chat before you talk trash Oikawa I see you typing.

**Oikawa** :

**Oikawa** : ok fine

**Oikawa** : This chat was made to talk about setting to eachother, to help eachother get better, and maybe something else-

**Moniwa** : Why would we need to help eachother? Wouldn’t that deceive the point of-

**Oikawa** : LET ME FINISH

**Kageyama** : How do you cut people in tex-

**Oikawa** : SHUT-

**Oikawa** : Let me finish DAMN.

**Oikawa** : And we could gossip ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) 

**Kenma** : Pass. Also wait-

- **Kenma** adds **Akaashi** to the chat-

**Kenma** : Suffer with me.

**Akaashi** : I feel like I’ve said something like that before...

**Akaashi** : Don’t know why

**Kenma** : Shhh I’m trying to defeat this boss

**Kageyama** : What are you playing?

**Kenma** : Animal crossing

**Kageyama** : Theres no bosses in animal crossing though...

**Kenma** : Yes there is

**Kenma** : It’s called trying to get out of debt-

**Kageyama** : That makes no sense...

**Oikawa** : Same as your intelligence but go off-

  
**Sugawara** : Say it again I dare you.

**Koganegawa** : My name is too long T-T

**Moniwa** : How about I just-

- _ **Moniwa** changes **Koganegawa’s** name to **Kogane**_ -

**Kogane** : Yay thank you Moniwa-Senpai!!!

**Moniwa** : Anything for you :)

**Sugawara** : :O

**Sugawara** : Is that

**Sugawara** : A FELLOW MOM????!!

**Sugawara** : I need to make a chat for that

**Sugawara** but in the meantime

- _ **Sugawara** has changed his name to **Sugamama**_ -

- _ **Sugawara** has changed **Moniwa’s** name to **Momiwa**_ -

- _ **Sugawara** has changed **Akaashi’s** name to **OwlMom**_ -

**OwlMom** :

**Momiwa** :

**Oikawa** : Haha you’re stuck with those names now

- _ **Sugamama** has changed **Oikawa’s** name to **Trash**_ -

**Trash** :

**Trash** : HOW RUDE -`д´- 

**Trash** : This disrespect smh

**Kenma** : I hate this chat can this chapter end already?

**OwlMom** : Chapter?-


	2. What am I doing with my life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> lol don’t kill me If this isn’t funny I’m running on 2 hours of sleep everyday-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m back kinda

- _3:29pm_ -

  
**Trash** : I’m still salty you changed my name to this

**Sugamama** : Speaking of salt

- _ **Sugamama** adds **Semi** to the chat_-

**Sugamama** : Add your boyfriend

**Semi** : My what??

**Sugamama** : That salty setter or whatever

**Semi** : Oh

- _ **Semi** adds **Shirabu** to the chat_-

**Shirabu** : No.

- _ **Shirabu** has left the chat_-

**Semi** : I tried.

**Trash** : Ew salt.

**Kageyama** : Ew trash.

**Trash** :

**Sugamama** : I have taught him well

**Sugamama** : I’m a proud mother

**Kageyama** : I prefer Sugawara-Senpai more than Oikawa-San

**Kenma** : lol he doesn’t even call you Senpai anymore

**Trash** : This disrespect

**Trash** : I can’t handle this abuse

**OwlMom** : This chat shouldn’t exist

**Kenma** : True

**Kageyama** : Can I add somebody

**Sugamama** : Shut the hell up Oikawa I see you typing

**Trash** :

**Sugamama** : You can add anybody you want Kageyama :)

- _ **Kageyama** has added **Miya** to the chat_-

- _ **Miya** has changed his name to **Atsumu**_ -

**Atsumu** : ‘Sup Tobio-Kun

**Atsumu** : I don’t wanna resemble my brother too much

**Atsumu** : that clown  🤡

**Atsumu** : Please don’t add him he is the bane of my existence-

**Trash** : Hey Noobio-Chan who’s this and why is he calling you by your first name

**Kenma** : Oh no there’s two Oikawa’s now.

**Trash** : WHATS THAT SUPPOSED TO MEAN?

**Kenma** : Exactly what it sounds like

**Atsumu** : anyways gtg I wanna hang out with Kita  ✌️

**Yahaba** : That’s pretty gay

**Kageyama** : How-

**Sugamama** : We’re all gay

**Trash** : True-

- _ **Semi** has added **Shirabu** to the chat_-

**Shirabu** : STOP ADDING ME-

**Shirabu** : Oh hey Shigeru.

**Yahaba** : Sup

**Semi** : So you’re only staying because Yahaba is here?

**Shirabu** : No I’m still leaving.

- **Shirabu** has left the chat-

- _ **Yahaba** has added **Shirabu** to the chat_-

**Yahaba** : Trash won’t let us leave sadly

**Shirabu** : Damn.

**Trash** :

**Sugamama** : NO SWEARS

**Kenma** : Keiji you see this shit?

**OwlMom** : No, I can’t see unfortunately.

**OwlMom** : The gay radar is picking up too much

**Sugamama** : What are you guys even talking about

**Kenma** : I don’t know

**Kenma** : I’m ending this

**Kenma** : Bye

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’m lazy ok-


	3. The singles and the sexually tense ones

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Semishira fighting for like half of this lmao.

- _4:56pm_ -

**Kenma** : How many of you SINGLES are here

**Trash** : Excuse you-

**Kenma** : Shut up, we already knew about you.

**Trash** :

**Atsumu** : I’m not single

**Kenma** : And who are you dating?

**Atsumu** :

**Atsumu** : My wall  😼👊

**Shirabu** : Wtf? Stop using cringy emojis.

**Shirabu** : You remind me of Tendou-San 

**Semi** : ^^

**Semi** : I still hate you though

**Shirabu** : Feelings mutual.

**Kenma** : Ha, singles.

**OwlMom** : Not everyone is lucky enough to get a boyfriend like you Kenma

**Sugamama** : I’m guessing Kuroo??

**Kenma** : Unfortunately

**Kenma** : OH CRAP HE CAME THROUGH MY WINDOW

**Kenma** : ABORT ABORT!!

** Kenma has gone offline **

**Sugamama** : When did we add that??

**Trash** : Forgot

**Sugamama** : Shut up Trash.

**Trash** : I HATE THIS CHAT

* * *

**Kenma** : So from what information I have

**Kenma** : the people who aren’t single are

**Kenma** : Sugawara, me sadly, and Kageyama

**Sugamama** : Wait Kageyama you’re dating someone?

**Kageyama** : Hinata

**Sugamama** : How did you know about this Kenma?

**Kenma** : Shoyo told me

**Sugamama** : oh

**Trash** : bruh my old kouhai has a boyfriend and I still don’t  😔

**Sugamama** : To be fair you like Hajime

**Sugamama** : He’s better than you lol

**Trash** : HOW ARE YOU ON A FIRST NAME BASIS WITH HIM?

**  
Trash** : Also RUDE WTF 

**Sugamama** : Mom things

**Trash** :

**Trash** : This is so unfair I-

**Trash** : (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻

**Trash** : ┬─┬ ノ( ゜-゜ノ)

**Sugamama** : What????

* * *

**Kenma** : Akaashi help Kuroo is here

**OwlMom** : no I’m cuddling Bokuto-San leave me alone

**Kageyama** : That’s pretty gay

**Trash** : WE’RE ALL GAY

**Sugamama** : True

**Shirabu** : God I hate this chat.

**Shirabu** : What did I do to deserve this

**Semi** : Exist.

**Shirabu** : Hey that’s my line!

**Shirabu** : Hoe-

**Yahaba** : Woah woah woah woah woah

**Yahaba** : Are you

**Yahaba** : BULLYING?

**Yahaba** : WITHOUT ME?

**Shirabu** : No, I’m about to start though.

**Shirabu** : Semi-San, would you like to be first?

**Semi** : Go away

- _ **Shirabu** has changed **Semi’s** name to **PunkSuga**_ -

**PunkSuga** : Stop changing my name to this smh

**Shirabu** : Not until you die.

**PunkSuga** : bet brb

**Shirabu** : Wait no-

- _Shirabu has deleted a message_ -

**Yahaba** : I saw what you deleted :)

**Shirabu** : No you didn’t fuck off.

- _ **Shirabu** has changed **Yahaba’s** name to _ _**Creampuff**_ -

**Creampuff** : I AM NOT-

- **Creampuff** has changed **Shirabu’s** name to **Shirashit** -

**PunkSuga** : That’s a new one

**PunkSuga** : I’ll tell Satori to add that to his nicknames book

**Shirashit** : Wait Semi-San no pls I’m sorry-

**PunkSuga** : Too late :)

**Shirashit** : Fuck you

**Sugamama** : NO SWEARS

**Shirashit** : WHY IS TENDOU-SAN CALLING ME???

**Shirashit** : HELP-

** Shirashit has gone offline **

**PunkSuga** : Guess I’ll go too then

** PunkSuga has gone offline **

**Kenma** : This was hardly bullying what the heck?

**Kenma** : One star and I’ll write a yelp review.

**OwlMom** : What-

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I’ll go to sleep now-


	4. Oh no

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> lol sorry I forgot this existed

- _3:17pm_ -

**Trash** : Hey guys guess what?  ＾＾

**Sugamama** : Whatever it is we don’t care

**Trash** : HOW DARE-

**Trash** : Y’all are so RUDE.

**OwlMom** : What do you want, Oikawa?

**Trash** : I was just gonna say Iwa-Chan was lookin fabulous today but NEVERMIND.

**Shirashit** : Literally nobody cares.

**Creampuff** : Seconded.

**Trash** : Bruh I-

- _ **Trash** has left the chat_-

**Shirashit** : Good riddance.

- _ **Sugamama** has added **Oikawa** back to the chat_-

**Sugamama** : You can’t escape the bullying

**Kenma** : Y’all can’t bully

**Kenma** : This is TRASH

**Shirashit** : Well-

**PunkSuga** : What did you REALLY want Oikawa?

**Oikawa** : I was GOING TO SAY that we should meet up :)

- **Shirashit** has left the chat-

- _ **Creampuff** has left the chat_-

- _ **Kenma** has left the chat_-

- **OwlMom** _has left the chat_ -

**PunkSuga** : I-

**Oikawa** : WOW. (´ ； ω ； `)

- _ **Sugamama** has changed **Oikawa** ’s name to **Dooru**_ -

**Dooru** : This was a mistake.

**Kageyama** : I’ll come Oikawa :D

- _ **Dooru** has left the chat_-

**Sugamama** : I-

**Atsumu** : What did I miss?

**Atsumu** : Nevermind.

** Atsumu has gone offline **

- _ **Sugamama** has added **Akaashi** , **Kenma** , **Shirabu** , and **Yahaba** back to the chat_-

**Sugamama** : Let’s not add Oikawa for a while, he’s a bad influence on the children

**PunkSuga** : Seconded.

- _ **Kageyama** has added **Oikawa** back to the chat_-

**Sugamama** : KAGEYAMA-

**Oikawa** : You guys are coming if you like it or not s( ・｀ヘ ´ ・ ;) ゞ

**Kenma** : Why did my name stay the same?

**Akaashi** : Don’t ask questions, we should never question life itself.

**Akaashi** : Also two of us are in Tokyo while you guys are in Miyagi. I have no idea where Atsumu lives.

**Atsumu** : I live in Hyogo Prefecture the best Prefecture  😼✋

**Kenma** : Those emojis are more cringe then Lev

**Moniwa** : Yep, made the right decision of muting this chat for both me and Kogane.

**Sugamama** :  👏 Wise decision  👏

**Kenma** : I hate this chat

**Akaashi** : You say that everyday

**Dooru** : Wait you guys haven’t answered me yet 

** Everyone went offline except one **

**Dooru** :

** Dooru has gone offline **

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> School is killing me I’m sorry aaaaaaa

**Author's Note:**

> Oop-


End file.
